The Legend of Hilaria (1913) pp. 35-57. The story of Hilaria: Syriac version
TRANSLATION OF THE SYRIAC TEXT.
For the pious, my Beloved, it is always good to occupy themselves with the holy doctrines, teaching the fear of God and leading us in the right ways which are pleasing unto God.
And especially with the stories of the memory of the works of the Saints, who lived well with God and were perfect in the holy service. For there is nothing of such profit to the pious soul as such meditations which show forth the excellent life and holy works and humble habit of monasticism.
For it is well known that there is no small consolation to be gathered from [an examination] as to how they lived and pleased God in humbleness; how they persisted in patience and in that love, which is a perfect sign of being a disciple of Christ, and in great works; how they persevered in steady and long fasting, how they humbled themselves in ascetic exercises beyond all power, and in performing abundant services beloved by God.
Not only blessed men have been seen doing this, but there have also been found women in all generations shining like stars in the whole world. And now, because |38 it is, as I have said, meritorious to make known by writing the memory of the deeds of the Saints, it is also beautiful for us to hand down and to write that which we have heard from trustworthy men who were eyewitnesses of the pious persons who were leading an angelic life by their deeds, and mortified their bodies by asceticism.
So [we will speak] firstly about a woman of royal descent, whose story is above [the power] of our weak words. So it would be becoming for us to be silent, because of our inability, but as such a work, however weak, is of profit for such persons as are longing with a pious mind to hear such things, we will not refrain from speaking, asking the help of God, giver of knowledge.
So we will begin with the time when the famous and pious king Zeno, was reigning beautifully; he was equal in faith and love of Christ to the glorious and great Constantine; but he was vexed and suffering from his having no son and successor to the throne after his death. His desire made him frequently pray and entreat God and send to saintly-living men in mountains and caverns and monasteries, that they should ask God to grant him his wish. This he did because he was very pious and expected that on account of their intercession 1) with God, who loveth his elected, they could acquire all from him. So shortly after-his accession to the throne a daughter was born to him, she with whom this story dealeth, truly a firstborn fruit of the prayer of the Saints and a reward of his rich vows. When she was sanctified by baptism, the holy sign of divine birth, she was called Hilaria. |39
She was educated as is becoming to children of faithful parents. A heavenly grace was spread over her and with her was to be found humbleness and great peacefulness; the doctrine of the holy Scriptures she learned soon and excelled by great wisdom. She had governesses who taught her the good doctrine, chaste women who were ascetically living as virgins. I mean nuns, who were visiting her constantly. While she recited with them the holy Scriptures and songs and services, there awoke in her the desire of assuming their habit. They told her about the life of holy men and humble virgins who had given themselves to God and were betrothed to Christ and had mortified their flesh by asceticism. They told her especially about the holy Fathers who were aboding in the desert of Egypt, which is called Skete.
All these things she concealed secretly in her soul and hoped that they could be realised in good season. But though she was anxious to assume the holy life and to perform the duties of waking and fasting which are becoming to the holy habit, she would not do this openly because she knew that it was not agreeable to the king and queen, that she had such plans: for they hoped that she would be a source of temporal joy to them; and they thought already about her marrying and having children, that would bear the royal dignity after them.
But she, while living alone in a room in the palace, was, according to a rule of divine wisdom, symbolically practising monasticism, fasting steadily and sometimes eating only every evening or every second day, with long vigils and constant standing in prayer, day and |40 night, reading the holy Scriptures and the stories of elect holy men and holy women. Meanwhile she looked for the realisation of the plan which she had conceived namely to go away secretly and to adopt the solitary life in the foreign country. She hoped fervently to see the Egyptian desert and to live with the solitary ascetics there.
Now her parents, the king and queen, were usually admitted to see her every fifth or tenth day, according to the rule laid down by her; because she would not converse with them frequently, for she lived in a retired manner and was in this way quietly practising the habit of chastety and humbleness under a pretext. Then it happened that the king, when visiting her, perceived that the grace and royal beauty, that was spread over her handsome face, was fading away, that her body was becoming emaciated, that her strength was diminishing and day by day she was fading away and decaying and that she was sinking into a serious decline. So he said: "What hath befallen thee, my daughter? Perhaps thou art sick and, because of thy bashfulness, thou wilt not reveal it to us? Or is there a sickness of heart of which thou informest us not? Verily, thou givest us much trouble and pain, on seeing thee fading away and decaying like one wounded and sick". But she said to them: "Suffer not anyhow, my father; for there is nothing that maketh me suffer, nor is there a pain that troubleth me. On the contrary, my heart rejoiceth very much, because thou art spared and enjoyest peace". So she cheered them up by these words.
As a rule her waiting-woman with whom she had intercourse brought her food from the palace, dishes of all kinds; but she took only the bread and the rest of |41 the food she sent secretly to the poor by the medium of that servant. When she had lived in such a way five years, steadily fasting every second day (she was at that time five and twenty years old), she thought that this was the time for going away to the abode she was longing for; but how could this plan be carried out if she Was seen by her servant every day? And if she were to be sought in vain, they would turn every stone and seek her in every direction and there would be no means of escaping.
But what devised she and what contrived she?
She adopted the rule of delaying [the visits of her servant] more and more, saying to her: "To day I have got food that will be sufficient for three days; trouble me not with thy visit till the fourth day hence. Let nobody know this; otherwise thou wilt be in danger on my account. But take the food, which is given to thee to bring it me, and take it secretly to the poor. And if my parents ask thee, say, as usually: She hath taken and eaten it". In this way she would, when being ready to go away, be able to prolong the interval between her visits and hinder her from entering during five days or more, in order to be able to reach a far distance on her journey before being sought and missed.
Thus she did during one year, saying to her servant: "Till the fourth day hence approach not unto my door". And soon she said: "Till the fifth day", and then: "Till the seventh".
When the day had come, that she was prepared for going away, she said secretly to her servant: "Take this dinar and buy for it a coat of hair and sandals and a cowl, but let nobody see or know it, for I will |42 give this to that nun, which often visiteth me, because I see that she is poorly dressed''. The servant took the dinar and accomplished all according to her command. After a few days Hilaria said to her: "Visit me not during five days". Thereupon she prepared herself for departing, took off the princely dress she was wearing and put on the coat of hair and the sandals.
Then she threw on the capuchin, took some food and some money for expenses and went away in the morning, while no one saw her, to the seashore which was not very far from the town, while a steady prayer was in her mouth and tears stood in her eyes.
Thus she prayed: "O God, Thou who guidest the Saints and leadest them on Thy eternal way, who art everywhere with them and leavest them never, lead me on this way and direct my feet on the way of salvation and bring me to the place which I long for, that I may have intercourse with Thy Saints and serve Thee with them in holiness and praise Thee eternally".
Now it happened that, by divine Providence, at that time a ship was ready for departing in the direction of Egypt, to Alexandria, the place where she wished to go to. When she had asked the people there and had heard "what she hoped, she gave the fare and embarked. And nobody of those who saw her, knew whether she was a man or a woman, because she was dressed humbly and chastely in the humble monastic dress and in the royal residence there were many of such monks and nuns; so those who saw her thought that she was like the rest.
The ship sailed and reached Egypt in a few days. |43 Then she left the ship, entered Alexandria and visited the holy places there, churches and monasteries and strengthened herself by the prayers of those who were performing in holiness the service there. While she was still walking through the town she saw an old hermit, an excellent man of those of the desert. Addressing him she asked in the first place after the way of living of the hermits in the desert, and whether they received strangers gladly into their community, and which place or convent was the first to be reached in the desert.
The hermit said to her: "Their way of living is that each of them reciteth separately and in his own way and every one accomplisheth the holy service in his cell, which he leaveth not during the whole week. But on Sundays, at the time of the ministration of the holy sacrifice, they go to the church that is situated in the midst of the cells and partake of the holy sacraments. Some of them cover their faces with their caps so as not to see anyone and not to be seen by anyone; every one fasteth as he chooseth and according to his strength, some of them every second day, others every third or fourth day. The conspicuous take food only once a week.
This consisteth of dry bread and olives, sometimes they take also boiled vegetables; others feed upon herbs like the beasts.
The monastery which is at the entrance of the desert is called that of Aba Macarius. It is said that the number of hermits belonging to it, amounteth to three thousand. And as to their love of strangers, it is great, praiseworthy and divine. But they admit amongst them no beardless youths nor indulgeth any one in seeing a woman". |44
When she heard this she replied and asked after the way to the desert. He told it her and she made an obeisance before him and received his blessing 2) and each of them went his own way, without knowing the other's sex and without asking after it. When he was far from her and out of sight, she knelt down in order to pray before God and thus she spoke: "Our Lord Jesus Christ, the life and salvation that hath dawned for us, thou who hast come to seek the forlorn, and to bring back to the way of truth those who have gone astray, Thou who leadest Thy Saints to the eternal way ---- turn to me the lost one, for I seek Thee, my Lord, and lead me at Thy right hand to Thy way of life, for Thee alone my soul loveth. And direct my feet in the way of salvation and receive me into Thy good harbour. For Thou art my strong hope and in Thee I have confided from my youth, now and for ever. Amen".
When she had finished her prayer and sealed herself with the holy sign, she took the way to the desert while continually prayer was in her mouth. After three days of travelling, she reached the convent of Aba Macarius, at the entrance of the desert.
It was a sabbathday, and while she was passing between the cells she saw none of the solitaries without the door of his cell. She ventured not to knock at a door; but on going round in order to find some one, she came to the church, their place of congregation. She entered to pray and saw the Presbyter who constantly was aboding there. After having finished her prayer, she asked his blessing, and he invited her to take rest, |45 saying: "From where cometh your pious person, o Father? and what is the cause, why thou visitest us, poor creatures?" For he thought that she was a man because of her manly dress and the changed colour of her face which had become dusky and black.
And thus she answered him in a manly tone: "Your servant, Father, cometh from Constantinople, in order to be the disciple of your holiness, if it please God and you". The Presbyter said: "What is Thy name?" She answered: "John the eunuch. As to my class I am a slave and I belonged to a noble and well-known Roman 3) man and performed with him the service of a slave. And when he deceased in peace, he freed me. Then being master of my own person, I have sought to please God above all and from fear of God I assumed the holy habit. But I had an infinite longing to see the Saints who in this desert are living ascetically and devoting their lives to God, and to pass the rest of my life with them. For that reason I have hastened to come to you now".
Thereupon the Presbyter said: "Thy coming is right, Father. Stay here and take rest to-day. Tomorrow, which is a Sunday, the solitaries will assemble here as usually in order to partake of the holy sacrifice".
So on Sunday morning, at the third hour the solitaries assembled into the above mentioned church; and when they had partaken of the sacramental sacrifice, the Presbyter told them the story of John, the eunuch. On their wish, she 4) was brought before them and throwing herself at their feet, her 4) lips murmered a prayer, |46 while she 5) was trembling from fear, that it might be known who and what 6) she 5) was.
Then they prayed over her, blessed her, spoke to her words of admonition and taught her how to conduct herself; they gave her also a separate cell and ordered a very old man in her neighbourhood: "Take John the eunuch and let him be as a son to thee and take care to be his guide in the doctrine which is necessary and in the rules laid down amongst us".
Thereupon the old man took her with him and showed her the cell and she dwelt amongst them and regulated her life as they did, in good work and labour. ----Thus far about her departing and arriving in the desert. ----
As to the governess which had served her while being in the royal palace, when the days had passed during which Hilaria had forbidden her to enter, she went to her service and saw that Hilaria was gone and that her royal garments were put aside in a corner of the apartment she at once understood that Hilaria had gone to devote herself to the service of God, and that therefore she had wanted the coat of hair and the capuchin.
Weeping and crying she went to the queen and told her what had happened but she revealed nothing about the rule of her food and her [rare] visits to her; for she was afraid of being endangered, because she had not told them the secret.
The king and the queen, being troubled by what they had heard, went to the apartment, and seeing that |47 their daughter Hilaria had gone, they were in great sorrow and grief.
The king wept, sobbing in a loud voice, and thus lamented: "Woe, my beloved daughter. Who hath severed thee from me? How can I live without thee, support of my old age, crown on my head? Now may death hasten to me and take from me the trouble that never can be consoled away".
When the nobles of the king heard what had happened, they came to lament with him. At once they sent messengers in all directions to ask and to seek. The convents were also examined but she was not found. After a few days the king recovered from his trouble, because he was certain that she had gone to devote herself to God.
And Hilaria, being in the desert of Skete, was going through great struggles and performing works of self-denial above human strength, in many vigils and long fasting, so that even the solitaries wondered at her endurance and patience.
And she was praiseworthy and great in the eyes of all people of her class, because of her great humility and her placidity and meekness.
When she had passed ten years in the desert, another daughter was born to her father the king. When this girl was five years of age, she was tried by the Evil-one. And as the Devil attacked her vehemently, her father said to himself: "There is no hope of healing my daughter, except by the prayers of the solitaries in Skete, who are very near to God and are allowed to speak to Him 7)". |48
Thus he resolved in his mind and prepared for her departing. He ordered a trustworthy man, one of his relatives, and he and an escort of soldiers took her, went on their way and reached the desert.
The solitaries had heard of this and many of them had departed, lest they should be seen by the soldiers and the other persons. John the eunuch too had hid himself, without knowing the case exactly.
When the messengers of the king arrived, they told the monks about his belief and his hope on them and explained the reason of their coming. They left the girl with them and returned to the king without delay.
On the next day the solitaries returned to their places and discussed to whom they should entrust the little girl. They choosed John the eunuch because he was a eunuch and advanced in holiness. Thereupon they sent for him and said to him: "The Fathers have discussed with whom the girl should be; and all of them agreed upon giving her to thee, be thou her support and teacher".
Being forced thus he obeyed their will and took the girl to his cell.
One time Hilaria asked the girl: "Answer, my sister, what I ask thee. What is the name of thy father, and what is the name of thy mother?" The girl said: "My father is called Zeno, my mother Augusta". She asked again: "Have they a son or daughter besides thee?" The girl answered: "I have no brother or sister at all, but as I have heard of my mother, who told it me weeping, before my birth they had another daughter, named Hilaria. But she went away from them secretely and nobody knoweth what became of her. They sought her industriously but she was not found". |49
When she heard this from her, she knew certainly that the girl was her sister, the daughter of the parents who had borne herself and with the fervour of a love not to be checked, she embraced her, the tears dropping from her eyes, on account of the girl's saying: "My mother told me weeping, that they had another daughter before me, who went away from them secretly".
When the girl had passed five years with Hilaria, she got recovery from the Lord and became excellent in wisdom and knowledge. She was also distinguished by humbleness and chastity, because Hilaria had taken great care to adorn her with all praiseworthy qualities.
So, when the messengers of the king, whom he used to send in order to get tidings of the girl, came, the Fathers sent her with them to her father. After her arrival, he noticed during his intercourse with her, that she excelled in wisdom and good works, and that she had got spiritual as well as bodily aid, being freed from the influence of the Evil one. So he rejoiced greatly and thanked and praised God.
He asked her: "My daughter, who was it to whom thou wast entrusted and with whom thou hast been? And how was he treating thee? For I will reward him with becoming signs of honour". The girl answered plainly: "When I was sent by thy majesty and the old men had taken me up, they discussed the next day to whom they should entrust me. And they agreed opon giving me to a trustworthy man, whose name is John the eunuch. With him I have been thenceforth and I have improved by him. He shew unto me an infinite love and honoured me greatly. I have never seen him eating before my eyes, nor lying down on the floor to sleep. |50 But when he was overcome by sleep, he would lean against the wall for some time and so he took some comfort from sleep. Innumerable was his kneeling down on the floor, and he ceased not praying and reciting night and day. He took food only once a week".
When the king heard this, he was grieved and he took up evil suspicions against John the eunuch, thinking that he was no eunuch. Being anxious to examine the matter exactly and to be relieved from his care, he sent for John and about ten of the other old men. Here Providence was already at work, in order to make known who John was and that he might be a good example to the glory of God.
When John and his companions had arrived, he lodged them in a quiet place as was becoming to their habit. But he took John and introduced him separately into the palace and held with him many discourses.
Hilaria had a cowl covering her face lest her father should recognise her. While she spoke to him words of admonition an unchecked stream of tears flowed from her eyes, on seeing her father and mother and her sister that was healed. But the king thought that her tears came from repentance. Sometime afterwards, the king said to her: "I have heard of the beautiful things thou art working and of the good thou hast wrought towards my daughter and that she hath received healing from the Lord by thy hands. I have called and forced thee to come towards me, that I may be deemed worthy of seeing thee and being helped by thy prayers and that my house may be blessed by thy footsteps. But I wish to hear from thee who thou art and from where thou earnest to the desert, and what |51 thy sex is". She answered: "Why askest thou me about this, the poorest and most miserable of all children of man? But, now that thou wilt know it, I say: as to my class I am a slave and as to my sex a eunuch. My lord freed me when dying; and being my own master I sought God, the true Lord, above all; Him I loved and to his service I devoted myself. Above all places, I have chosen the dwelling in the desert in order to receive support from the Saints there, by whose prayers I have had the joy of healing the girl".
When the king had interrogated her circumstantially and revealed the trouble of his thoughts and the doubts of his heart, she resolved to relieve him from his cares and from the thoughts which were making a pernicious war against his soul. For she pitied him as a good father and a just king. She said to him: "I will reveal to thee a secret. But swear to me first by the Lord, that thou shalt accomplish my will in all things 1 ask and that thou shalt not oppose me in any thing I wish and that this secret shall not be revealed to any one besides the queen and the girl".
When Hilaria had said this to the king, the tears flowed unchecked from her eyes and she was choked by sobbing. The king swore to her plainly, without thinking of who she might be, for her face was invisible by the cowl which covered it and her speech was altered 8) by reciting in the Egyptian language; and, besides, twenty years had elapsed since she left them, and he thought that she had already died.
When she saw that the king had given his assurance |52 by his oath, she took them with her to an inner apartment, took the capuchin off, uncovered her face, showed herself to him and said: "I am whom thou seest, Hilaria, the poor, thy daughter whom thou knowest".
When the king and the queen heard the name Hilaria, they were disturbed and they swooned and fell down on the floor and were as dead.
When Hilaria saw what happened and that her parents were near dying, she took water and signed them with the cross, and sprinkled it on their faces, so that they revived and rose. The king weeped vehemently and they were in great sorrow and scarcely could check their crying and weeping. Then the king and the queen threw themselves at her and kissed her eyes and her hands.
Some time afterwards the king, having recovered from his weeping, said to her: "Hilaria, my beloved daughter, it is a great thing to me, to have seen to-day in thee, that an offspring pleasing to God cometh forth from me and that I may give to God a daughter who is accepted by Him. If thou wouldst only show me this kindness". Hilaria said: "What wishest thou?" The king said: "I have sworn the oath, and thy will shall be accomplished wholly. Only, if thou art willing, allow me to make for thee and those with thee a dwelling-place in our neighbourhood, that will be an abode to thee, in the same manner as there, be it for dwelling separately or commonly, as thou desirest".
But Hilaria agreed not with this, speaking: "It is not well to alter the beautiful institutions which have pleased to the Ancients, and to change a place which has been fittingly set apart by the chosen Fathers for their rest and abode. But, if thou allowest, we soon will |53 take leave in peace. The king submitted to her will and withstood not the word of her mouth concerning all which she said to him".
Five days afterwards, he dismissed her and those with her. And they gave them presents and signs of honour and gifts of gold and silver, and tapers and perfumes and oil, and costly garments for adorning the altars and churches of the convents in the desert.
But Hilaria accepted not the gold and the silver saying: "Gold and silver are usually not to be seen, in the desert. But we will take these other presents". Secretly she said to him: "If thou wilt, we shall spend this gold and silver for works which I will mention to thee. There are places in the desert, where the solitaries are distressed by want of water and the large distance of it. Others are unfit for dwelling, because of the absence of materials necessary for buildings. Send a trustworthy man and let him dig pits and build well-secured dwelling-places and make holes and hidden caves for those who wish to dwell in them secretly, not openly. This will give thee the wages of righteousness".
Her father said to her: "Ay, beloved mistress, I shall accomplish all according to thy wish". Then she took leave and departed from the palace with weeping and crying, and reached the desert of Skete, with the Fathers who were accompanying her.
A few days afterwards the king sent a trustworthy man according to Hilaria's wish. He gave him much money for the expenses of the buildings and for erecting well-secured towers. And thus he spake to him: "Go straightway to John who is called the eunuch; he will tell thee what to do, accomplish his will". |54
When this trustworthy man arrived he did all that Hilaria told him; [he made] cells and pits and caves fit for dwelling therein and high, well-secured houses.
Having finished all, he went back in peace.
Hilaria took up her former way of life, struggling in work and difficult tasks. Her father sent continually messengers to her.
So within every month he sent some one to ask about her, secretly, nobody knowing of it. But this remained not concealed from the solitaries; although not knowing it certainly, yet they presumed John to be a relative or an acquaintance of the king. From that time they began to show her 9) signs of honour in the assemblies and in the church. When she perceived their presumption, she began to be afraid that gradually her position might become known and her labour might be lost by vain glory.
So she left them secretly, while they perceived it not, and went to a more remote part of the desert. She concealed herself in a suitable cave in the earth, which she found according to her desire. At fixed intervals she went through the ravine, which led from the bottom of her cave under the earth to the ground, and got up to take the fresh air during a long time. At the mouth of the cave was a well and a little garden of wild vegetables. Whenever she wanted some food she took it there, and drank from the well; so she lived in the cave for ten years. The whole time of her staying in the desert was thirty years. By her heavy labour she was fast decaying so that she, from weakness and old age, |55 lay down on the bottom of her cave to perform her prayer to God. At that time God exhorted three solitaries of the desert, Aba Isidorus and Aba Isaie and Aba Isak, to go through the desert in order to visit the solitaries. They took with them fruits and bread made of flour, garments and coats, to provide and strengthen the sick and weak people with, if they should find them; or if they were dead, to shroud their corpses and to bury them honourably.
On their march through the desert, one day at noontime, they came near the place where Hilaria was living and hearing from within the earth a sound of groaning as from a sick person they wondered and investigated what it might be; so they found the entrance of the ravine on the surface of the earth, but, on going down to enter it they feared that that sound might come from a wild animal there. Going round they perceived the garden and the well and signs of human footsteps. Then they understood that a solitary must be living there. They took heart and entered the ravine and reaching the bottom of the cave, they saw a light as clear as daylight, as the rays of the sun. Then they looked and saw a human being lying on the ground and groaning; the hair of the head was white as wool. When they had prayed and said: "Bless me my Lord", she raised her eyes, perceived them, rose quickly and received them with a salutation. Then they sat down and asked about her coming there, saying: "When hast thou come here, Father? and from which direction hath come thy pious person?"
For they presumed her to be a man.
She answered them and spoke with them excellent |56 words. At last she said to them: "My Fathers, you are sent to-day by God, in order to bury me". Then she rose, and prayed. Having finished her prayer, she stretched herself on the earth and entrusted her spirit to God.
When the Fathers saw that she was dead they praised God and took her immediately from that cave to the ground. There they performed over her the burial service and were going, as was becoming, to shroud her body, presuming her to be an ascetic man like others, who are beardless by great heat 10). But touching her corpse outwardly, they perceived it to be a woman's and, full of astonishment, they praised Christ, who kindleth the fire of His Love in all mankind, men and women, old men and youths and children.
Then they buried her as she was, and interred her. While their lips murmured a hymn of praise, they went to wash their hands in the well from which she used to drink and to eat of the vegetables there in order to receive a blessing thereby. But they found that well dried up and the garden withered; but in the cave
where she had lived, the water rose, and went up to the surface of the earth and streamed there. Then they praised still more on account of a wonder, the like of which they had neither seen nor heard.
They stayed there three days, entreating God and saying: "O Lord, show thy servants who thy servant was and from where she came".
When the days of death were over, in a divine revelation, there was said to them: "Make a memorial-day for the odour 11) which was accepted by God, three |57 days before, which belongeth to Hilaria, the daughter of king Zeno, who, while dwelling amongst you before, was called John the eunuch". Three days afterwards they departed and went and told the Fathers what they had seen.
This is the Life and holy works of Hilaria. We, chaste brethren and faithful sisters, being envious of the works of the Saints, must imitate their beautiful deeds and perform good works, that we may attain life everlasting, of which we may be deemed worthy by the Grace and Love of Christ. To Him be praise with His Father and the Holy Spirit for ever and ever. Amen.
Here endeth the story of Hilaria, the daughter of king Zeno, who left the house of her parents secretly and led an ascetic life in the desert of Egypt.
[Footnotes renumbered and moved to the end]
4. 2) The MS. has the masculine.
5. 1) The MS. has the masculine.
7. 1) Litt.: Who have parrhsi/a.
8. 1) According to a correction of the text.
11. 2) Cf. Acta Martyrum , ed. Bedjan, I, 187, 17.
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